20070627

0045

TRICK OR TREAT


i know all the tricks i just dont want to apply them that would be a desecration it would be good enough for someone else maybe but i need more than a cheap trick i prefer being surprised by something really nice and qualitative something fresh you despite your own kind you produce the things you detest you share most of the faults but you choose to blame them only im gonna wait here patiently and watch the whole performance i wonder if its worth all the crap im gonna applaud every impressing part and laugh out loud at all the jokes just to push it a bit further just to see how many of them youll try to buy with those lame tricks and if it fails i wont say a word i promise i wont exult i swear coz itd be my own defeat also a complete fiasco nothing to rejoice about.


20070626

0044

EMERGED.


there are too many things on my mind i might change perhaps get different or maybe even disappoint some of you and if so well the pleasure is all mine this time wicked indecent ideas intoxication impatience should take off get released i admit i do forget intentionally or just out of some purely childish kind of stupidity and naiveness like a kid who keeps sending letters to santa just to keep the magic going.


20070623

20070622

0043

IM NOT HERE. PLEASE LEAVE A SIGNAL AFTER THE MESSAGE.


why exactly does it start for why exactly do i stop dreaming every morning whats the deal id like to have a dog then id understand why then itd make more sense whats next i wouldnt mind if it had to end now i wouldnt i swear i realized that back then when i was the only one who was asleep yes well im always late for everything and i always oversleep the best things so why wouldnt i oversleep this one also or finally get fully awake calculated selfish cold or however you name it you get the same at the end anyway the more shallow the wider smile i guess you cant fill it all at once its one or another thats fair that makes more sense im still decanting and i wish i had a dog.


20070621

0042

ELUSIVE [INFERNO], SUBTLE


shake it off it blurs the sight it contorts the picture makes everything look different nicer explainable logic well shaped makes the voice sound mellow makes the same stories sound happy makes me smile for no reason at all.


20070611

0041

-LESS


seems like everythings perfect and in its right place all peaceful and eased on the outside all important busy socialized planned rational smiling walking working talking drawing buying eating drinking sleeping dreaming kissing reading writing coming going meeting shaking hands but on the inside theres a real chaos noise crowd hundreds thousands of demons thunderstorms vortexes all colorful and colorless in panic running around hard rain cold showers shadows nights nightmares sore sour bitter.


20070601

0040

WORMS


its an obscure machinery that rumbles grinds mills chops stabs with its hammers teeth jaggers bevel gears doNOT even think about that its too big to get to see it all just close your eyes and swallow it like dogs and cats eat the placenta make it all clean no blood no proofs kill the babies put them in a bag hide them away bury them before anyone asks anything the only problems gonna be the remorse the one that appears late at nite right before youre about to fall asleep like a baby oops did i say baby how much more are you gonna buy how much longer are you gonna be devoted to that role of stupidity and naiveness are you really that sure its your plan are you really that sure its all your decision are you really that sure it didnt slip out of yr hands are you really sure its not going too far already are you sure its how youve imagined it are you sure are you?